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The lady of the week Updated on August 15, 2010 More

"You write that you seek a loving and caring man who wishes to make a family. I believe that the family should be the center of ones life, a person may have all the wealth in the world but if he have no love he is poor and if his life has not lead to children I feel his life has been fruitless. Children require loving parents, and when they have them they can grow into very beautiful people. Wouldn't you agree your daughter is the most precious part of your life? How I envy you that you have such a source of joy. I can assure you that I would think of our family first, and that my family would accept you and your daughter with great joy. I lead a good healthy lifestyle, I don't drink or smoke, and have the time and resources we would need to create warmth in the family, I work in education, and enjoy my challenging work very much. I am stable and able to provide security. What do you think of family? What do you think of raising children? I Imagine it must be very difficult for you as a single mother, how do you manage?"

"My interests are varied. I like to travel. I have been to many areas of the U.S. but New England is home. It is such a rich and varied region that even after a lifetime living here I feel I have barely begun to see and experience all that is available. I enjoy motorcycles, automobiles, computers, the Internet (obviously), working out at the local gym, running along the back roads, many other sports, hiking, going to the beach to name only a few. I also like to put on dressy or even formal wear and go out to dinner or to the opera, symphony, and even the ballet! I read a great deal and am interested in other cultures and people.

I hope you enjoy my note and picture ________ and will look forward to hearing from you."

One of the largest problems that the ladies have is writing an answer. I deal with this in 2 ways, I leave pretty important information out, leaving them with questions they would have to ask to make an educated decision. I then when writing, use a lot of questions, every question mark gives her a reason to answer, the simple fact that you asked so many might produce a reply in itself. Telling a bit about what you enjoy gives plenty of room to ask a few good questions.

"My interests are varied. I like to travel, but I have never been to Russia, I imagine my trip will be very interesting. Do you have any suggestions before I come? I have been all over the US but never to Europe, Do you enjoy traveling? I like to travel regularly, but traveling alone is not that fun. I like riding motorcycle, do you like riding them? Do you know how to drive? I like computers as well, interesting pieces of silicon. Do you have a computer to use to send electronic mail? Do you enjoy sports? I run every couple of days, to stay fit and healthy. I don't want to give you the wrong impression, I think my lifestyle is a good balance of cultural activities on the town as well as just enjoying home.

I look forward to knowing that you received my letter, and ask that you tell me as soon as you can if the dates I planned on would work for you. I really hope so. I had this letter translated and if it's easier for you to reply in Russian you may.

Sincerely Yours,
Tom,
palm street, USA
tom@mail.ru"

Dear Tatyana Nicholiyevna,
Imagine how hard it must be for me to find a few words to start a letter that might change the rest of my life. Since I saw your photo and read your information on the internet, my mind has been occupied with the impression you left on me. You are a very lovely lady, your eyes, your lips, your warm smile. When I heard that men from America could meet Russian women on the internet, I asked myself why would they go all the way around the world to meet a lady when there are so many fine ladies here. Now I understand completely, and have decided that if the love of my life is in another country, I'm in the wrong place.

I am a decisive person, I make a decision and then carry it out. I have decided that if I must go to Russia to meet a lady like you, then I can do that. I able to visit you on (travel date), I have looked at my calendar and checked on a ticket. I am sure we could learn much about each other in person. Don't you think this is best? I am a very nice guy (at least I think so) and would love the opportunity to get to know you better. I am seeking a true love, a partner for life and someone to create a family with.

You write that you seek a loving and caring man who wishes to make a family. I believe that the family should be the center of one's life, a person may have all the wealth in the world but if he have no love he is poor and if his life has not lead to children I feel his life has been fruitless. Children require loving parents, and when they have them they can grow into very beautiful people. Wouldn't you agree your daughter is the most precious part of your life? How I envy you that you have such a source of joy. I can assure you that I would think of our family first, and that my family would accept you and your daughter with great joy. I lead a good healthy lifestyle, I don't drink or smoke, and have the time and resources we would need to create warmth in the family, I work in education, and enjoy my challenging work very much. I am stable and able to provide security. What do you think of family? What do you think of raising children? I Imagine it must be very difficult for you as a single mother, how do you manage?

My interests are varied. I like to travel. but I have never been to Russia, I imagine my trip will be very interesting. Do you have any suggestions before I come? I have been all over the US but never to Europe, Do you enjoy traveling? I like to travel regularly, but traveling alone is not that fun. I like riding motorcycle, do you like riding them? Do you know how to drive? I like computers as well, interesting pieces of silicon. Do you have a computer to use to send electronic mail? Do you enjoy sports? I run every couple of days, to stay fit and healthy. I don't want to give you the wrong impression, I think my lifestyle is a good balance of cultural activities on the town as well as just enjoying home.

I look forward to knowing that you received my letter, and ask that you tell me as soon as you can if the dates I planned on would work for you. I really hope so. I had this letter translated and if it's easier for you to reply in Russian you may.

Sincerely Yours,
Tom ...,
tom@mail.ru
(If I thought a another day on the letter, it's probably be better)

Now, Tom is going to send a few photos, they might give indication to his age, height and weight. But note, I left that information out. I used a lot of questions, but really said little. You can include this info, but with a well written letter they often forget to ask on the second and 3rd letter. Some of these ladies have priorities that you can touch on to make the difference.

Some introduction letter composition do's and don't

• Do try to keep it fairly short, if you are sending more than a 1 - 1.5 pages it's too much. Victor who wrote to the list last week that he wrote 600 ladies sent a 7-8 page introduction letter. This alone scared off 80%.
  
• Do personalize it, you'll need to focus on keywords she uses in her advertisement.
  
• Don't get into topics that might be very controversial. For example, all the Russian women I know like sex, but don't walk around telling it to strangers. Leave it for a topic later.
  
• Don't talk bad about all the women you dated, do get into the details or past relations so on and so forth, they come later.
  
• Don't try to tell everything. It's and Introductory letter, not a biography..
  
• Leave out poems that might not translate well, they have their place.
  
• Don't send dried flowers with you letter (It's a bad omen)
  
• Use simple English. Use hard not arduous, simple not unadorned.
  
• Use a spell checker, it's hard to find the meaning of an misspelled word.
  
• Print your letter making it easy to read.

Now you have the letter, but content isn't everything, timing and delivery has a lot to do with it.

For every lady you decided to write go buy a nice Hallmark card or something, print your letter on nice paper and put a couple of photos in your letter and send it by regular mail. It will take about 2 weeks to get to it's destination.

After 2 weeks time, send the same letter by email. Having it translated is best, then ask which language is best.
On the third week send a follow up letter to any of the ladies you didn't get an answer from. Just a short note saying you were really hoping on hearing from her, and wanted to make sure she got the first letter. (you might send a copy)

By the end of any second letter you should be somewhere about 80% reply rate. The mailing from your home country is important, you might send registered letters to insure their delivery. The fact that you send a translated letter and resend it again shows you are determined and thoughtful. The fact that you follow up if you don't get a reply right away lets them know you were really thinking about them.

3 months is plenty of time to correspond, rarely do we see any really pertinent content in letters after this amount of time. Most of the time people fall into exchanges of pleasantries and talk of the weather and the price of rice in China.

It's important to remain focused and ask the hard hitting questions once you have well established communications. Give yourself a day or 2 between when you get a letter and when you reply. This will let you pace yourself when writing so many ladies.

At some point you'll need to sit down and decide if there are too many to meet in person, and decide who seems to be best for you. I recommend meeting many ladies, the more the better.

Some other misc.. thoughts

• Probably not best to send money to anyone if you'll whine about it later.


• Don't just drop the correspondence, send at least a dear Jane letter.


• Don't try to hide the fact that you are writing others. Be honest, and explain she should do the same.


• Don't break from your plan.


• Don't enter a "I write you only - you write me only" pact with any of the ladies.

In all reality, it's a lot of work with this process, you are probably looking at some 150-250 letters over a 3 month period of time. As I mentioned above many men say that they learned as much in a few hours with the lady. But I can not argue with the fact that you can get some good information before you travel. My thought is at what cost does that information come. Wouldn't your time be wiser spent in person. 90% of all ladies we contact agree to meet a man who is in their home town ready to meet them. If you look at our website, you'll see that the 90% leave quite a few really nice options.

Regardless if you decide to write or just get on a plane I wish you the best.

Best Wishes,
David

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